Long Ago and Far Away in Enchanted Lands across the seas lived Kings and Queens, Princes and Princesses, Good Fairies and Wicked Witches, Ferocious Giants and Gentle Dwarfs, Dodgy Priests and Giant Pink Phalluses.
In ancient days, an Aino chieftain of Iwanai went to sea in order to catch sea-lions, taking with him his two sons. They speared a sea-lion, which, however, swam off with the spear sticking in its body. Meanwhile a gale began to blow down from the mountains. The men cut the rope which was fast to the spear. Then their boat floated on. After some time, they reached a beautiful land. When they had reached it, a number of women in fine garments came down from the mountains to the shore. They came bearing a beautiful woman in a litter. Then all the women who had come to the shore returned to the mountains. Only the one in the litter came close to the boat, and spoke thus: "This land is woman-land, It is a land where no men live. It being now spring, and there being something peculiar to this country of mine you shall be taken care of in my house until the autumn; and in the winter you shall become our husbands. The following spring I will send you home. So now do you bear me to my house."
Thereupon the Aino chief and his sons bore the woman in the litter to the mountains. They saw that the country was all like moorland. Then the chieftainess entered the house. There was a room there with a golden netting, like a mosquito-net. The three men were placed inside it. The chieftainess fed them herself. In the day-time numbers of women came in. They sat beside the golden mosquito-net, looking at the men. At nightfall they went home. So gradually it got to be autumn. Then the chieftainess spoke as follows, "As the fall of the leaf has now come, and as there are two vice-chieftainesses besides me, I will send your two sons to them. Yon yourself shall be husband to me." Then two beautiful women came in, and led off the two sons by the hand, while the chieftainess kept the chief for herself.
So the men dwelt there. When spring came, the chieftain's wife spoke thus to him: "We women of this country differ from yours. At the same time as the grass begins to sprout, teeth sprout in our vaginas. So our husbands cannot stay with us. The east wind is our husband. When the east wind blows, we all turn our buttocks towards it, and thus conceive children. Sometimes we bear male children. But these male children are killed and done away with when they become fit to lie with women. For that reason, this is a land which has women only. It is called woman-land. So when, brought by some bad god, you came to this land of mine, there were teeth in my vagina because it was summer, for which reason I did not marry you. But I married you when the teeth fell out. Now, as the teeth are again sprouting in my vagina because spring has come, it is now impossible for us to sleep together. I will send you home tomorrow. So do you tell your sons to come here to-day in order to be ready."
The sons came. The chieftainess stayed in the house. Then, with tears streaming down her face, she spoke thus; "Though it is dangerous, to-night is our last night. Let us sleep together!" Then the man, being much frightened, took a beautiful scabbard in a bag in his bosom, and lay with the woman with this scabbard. The mark of the teeth remained on the scabbard. The next day dawned. Then the man went to his boat, taking his sons with him. The chieftainess wept and spoke thus: "As a fair wind is blowing away from my country, you, if you set sail and sail straight ahead, will be able to reach your home at Iwanai." So then the men entered their boat, and went out to sea. A fair wind was blowing down from the mountains, and they went along under sail. After a time they saw land; they saw the mountains about Iwanai. Going on for a time, they came to the shore of Iwanai. Their wives were wearing widows' caps. So their husbands embraced them. So the story of woman-land was listened to carefully. All the Ainos saw the beautiful scabbard which the chief had used with that woman.
The chieftainess spoke thus: “From this day on, a celebration will be held to celebrate the return of our husbands to us so that we may bear children. But also let it be known that they were unfaithful to us. And should any man be deceitful in this manner to his wife, he shall be punished and his penis bitten off and shown to all men in warning.”
To this day a yearly festival is held in which a large metal phallus in a boat, representing the “safe” return of the chieftain thanks to his scabbard is paraded through the streets along with all the noise making that accompanies a good festivals in Japan.
The metal phallus represents the scabbard that protected the man in the story and shows that he is still virile. It is carried in a boat showing the faithful and safe return of the husbands to their wives, even across great distances.
The pink non metal phallus carried by women shows the punishment that awaits unfaithful husbands. On the day many lollipop like sweets in the shape of a phallus are eaten to again reinforce the message of what will happen to men who stray.
A young woman walks alone at the head of the parade wearing the “widow's cap”. It is said that the wives believed their husbands had been taken by the Tengu (the red faced devil) who thus stands between her and any children she might have had represented by the young girls in the white and orange robes.
I have taken the story above from Aino Folk-Tales by Basil Hall Chamberlain. He was an anthropologist who studied the Aino and Japan in the 1880s and collected a series of stories and folk-tales on one of his visits. Modern Aino (also Ainu) live only in the northern island of Hokkaido although it is believed that they once occupied a much larger area of the Japanese mainland until they were gradually forced northwards.
On another note it’s cherry blossom season again and since it is basically illegal to not take a picture of one when they are blooming…
